I ran in to her brother at the store today and he mentioned the dinner and said that he was sorry I couldn’t make it. She invited some of her friends and her mom and brothers. Today, I found out that she was really at a dinner where she was celebrated for this award. Last Friday, she said she had to work late and it was cool. Now I don’t know what to do because I just found out today that she won a pretty big award at her job. In the evenings, she just turns on the tv and we watch something until bed. We really don’t talk about anything that doesn’t have to do with our life/household. I didn’t want to talk about our problems anymore, but I didn’t mean stop talking period. She’s very sweet, but it’s just like she doesn’t care anymore. When I ask about her day, she says “fine.” When I talk to her about work or politics or my day, she says “oh wow. So now, a year later, she barely talks to me at all. I know it’s harsh, but I was at my wits end. She told me that she was trying to communicate because she didn’t feel appreciated and that I had one foot out the door. I provide everything we need, can I just have a break? I told her that if she had a problem with the way I did things then she could get out of my house and we’d get a divorce.
I was just tired of hearing everything I was doing wrong. So, I told her about a year ago that I didn’t want to talk anymore. But it was like we were just always sitting down for a serious talk. It was so many different ways that she came to that conclusion. It felt like we were always talking about what I did wrong: she thought I spent too much time talking to exes (we were friends), I don’t prioritize her over work (it’s my career, am I supposed to quit?), and mostly that I didn’t care enough about her. However, she also used to want to talk about problems we were having. She used to share her day with me, just randomly tell me her thoughts, stuff like that. My wife (31/f) and I (46/m) have been together for six years, married for two.
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